Did you ever hear the saying, “it’s all in your head”? It turns out that it is indeed all in your head. Let me explain this with the awesome mental model known as the Self-Coaching Model. The Self-Coaching Model was developed by non-other than Brooke Castillo. She is the co-founder and CEO of the Life Coach School and has several books like the Self-Coaching 101: Use your Mind – Do not Let It Use You. It is an eye-opening book that discussed how you can train your mind to have the results you have always dreamed of.
The Self-Coaching Model simply says that there are 5 aspect that can be studied to understand the outcomes that we are getting. 1 of which is beyond our direct control and the 4 are within our direct control. The five aspects are: Circumstances, Thoughts, Feelings, Actions and then Results.
The circumstances are happenings in life that are beyond our control. These are factual events that lead to certain thoughts. Thoughts, may it be helpful or unhelpful, will give forth to emotions. Emotions which may be good or bad will in turn affect your actions. And we all know that your actions are the basis for your results. By understanding this model, we begin to see that our results are the outcome of our thoughts turned to feelings and to actions. This gives us ownership of our results. It also empowers us knowing that we are in control of what we want to achieve.
Circumstances
It is said that these are factual events that everybody can agree on. This is also beyond our direct control. Ironically, we usually blame this uncontrollable aspect as the basis of the results we are getting. It is also important to see that circumstances are neutral; it is neither good or bad until we put a thought classifying it as good or bad.
Thoughts
Thought are the voices in your head. This is the first aspect in the model that we are directly in control. Many thoughts come and go in our mind and most of the time it goes unsupervised. When we failed to verify our thoughts and filter out the destructive ones, these causes many problems. Thoughts are immensely powerful. It can build you up and assist you in the results you want. Or it can be a heavy chain pulling you down. Guard your thoughts my friends.
Feelings
Feelings are the emotions we feel. These feelings came from the thoughts that we allow thru. Feelings should be recognized and not buried deep. It is also important to understand that no one can cause you to feel a certain way unless you give power to it with your thoughts.
Actions
These are the movements or what we do or do not do base on our feelings. It is said that base on your feelings, there can be actions, inactions, or reactions. To understand why we are doing or not doing something regarding a certain circumstance, we should examine the feelings that we have on that circumstance.
Results
These are the outcomes of our actions, inactions, or reactions. We now see that our results are determined not by our circumstances but on our thoughts turned to feelings and then to actions. By understanding this we should realize that we are fully responsible for the results we have and that there are no such things as you are hopelessly trap in a certain circumstance.
Congratulations! You are now an empowered individual that will take responsibilities for the results that you have.
For more reading about how your thoughts can limit or build you check out my other post: How to Be Limitless? Limiting Belief Awareness and Destroying Them.